Harry Styles(8): Week of July, 2nd 2022

 

Hello everybody, and what’s up? Well if it was a week that showed me that this countdown totally does not make sense at all and tells me it hates me, this is that week(as you can probably tell by looking at our exits, if you can already see them) Man, this shit just does not get any better does it, I mean this week was so embarrassing for Hits 1, that I had to personally go on not 1, but 2 rants in this post, and tell them on my survey that they need to man the fuck up and push different songs(although that probably won’t happen), so yeah I’m a bit unmotivated at the moment to do this, but ya know what I’m pulling through and doing it anyways for you guys cuz I just don’t wanna let y’all down. Also this weeks #1 song can proceed to fuck off any time now, and Hitbound just doesn’t seem to get any better. Alright, one announcement though before we get into it, round 2 of Summer madness is now up and it is due this Friday, so if your signed up make sure to get your votes in for the songs you love. Anyways, let’s now get into one of the worst countdowns I’ve ever seen and heard in my life starting with our exits. 

Exits 

Duke & Jones/Louis Theroux-Jiggle Jiggle(29)(Ate you fucking kidding me) 

Panic at the disco-Viva Las vengeance(26) 

The Chainsmokers-I Love U((22)(Oh come on how long is shit going to keep happening for with every one of their songs are you fucking serious) 

The countdown 

#30 Drake-Masssive(Debut)(1 week) 

#29 Amelia Moore-I feel everything(+1)(2 weeks) 

#28 Tai Verdes-sheluvme(Debut)(1 week) 

#27 Charlie Puth/Jung Kook-Left and Right(Debut)(1 week) 

#26 Halsey-So Good(+2)(3 weeks) 

#25 Alec Benjamin-Devil doesn’t bargain(=) (3 weeks) 

#24 Marshmello/Khalid-Numb(+3)(3 weeks) 

#23 Lady Gaga-Hold my hand(-6)(5 weeks) 

#22 Post Malone/Doja Cat-I like you(A happier song)(+2)(4 weeks) 

#21 Sam Smith-Love me more(+2)(9 weeks) 

#20 Jack Harlow-First Class(=)(11 weeks) 

#19 Em Behold-Numb little bug(+2)(20 weeks) 

#18 Calvin Harris/Dua Lipa/Young Thig-Potion(-2)(4 weeks) 

#17 Maeskin-Supermodel(+2)(7 weeks) 

#16 Megan Thee Stallion/Dua Lipa-Sweetest Pie(-2)(16 weeks) 

#15 The Kid Laroi-Thousand Miles(+3)(10 weeks) 

#14 Camilla Cabello/Ed Sheeran-Bam Bam(-5)(17 weeks) 

#13 Leah Kate-10 things I hate about you(=)(10 weeks) 

#12 5 Seconds of Summer-Me, Myself & I(+3)(7 weeks) 

#11 Ava Max-Maybe You’re the problem(=)(9 weeks) 

#10 Lauv-All 4 nothing(I’m so in love)(+2)(11 weeks) 

#9 The Weeknd-Out of time(-1)(14 weeks) 

#8 Harry Styles-Late night talking(+2)(4 weeks) 

#7 Imagine dragons-Bomes(=)(11 weeks) 

#6 Dove Cameron-Boyfriend(=)(18 weeks) 

#5 Shawn Mendes-When You’re Gone(=)(13 weeks) 

#4 Lizzo-About Damn Time(=)( 11 weeks) 

#3 Ed Sheeran/Lil Baby-2Step(=)14 weeks) 

#2 Nicky Youre/Dazy-Sunroof(=)(12 weeks) 

#1 Harry Styles-As it was(=)(8th really annoying week at #1, can this shit change please?)(13 weeks) 

Debuts 

Starting off with an interesting song of all sorts(that really shouldn’t have replaced one of our exits, even though it makes total and complete sense) it’s Drake and the new single off his very surprising album Honestly Nevermind called Massive. Now this album is a dance album let’s get that straight and it completely took over the dance charts when it was released(and in fact it’s still doing that) now you probably know how I feel about that with me obviously loving actual EDM artists. Yeah this shit shouldn’t be taking over the dance charts, and I’m not sure why the rap songs on the album are all jacking up space that literally could be used for other artists such Tiesto, Kygo and you know of course my guys The Chainsmokers, but in all honesty while I don’t think Drake should be dominating the dance charts with this crap, it’s honestly not that bad, or at least this song off the album isn’t anyway. The production here is really nice and I can tell it was really well done because the mixing sounds perfect. Whatever sound is used at the beginning(kinda sounds like a search radar) adds a really nice sound to it and just really enhances this. A lot of the breakouts Hits 1 edited out, which is good anyways because this song is 5 and a half minutes long. Drake sounds really good here actually, I’ve never really been in love with his voice or his more R&B type stuff, but this isn’t actually that horrible for him. The writing is really good here to, it’s not really all that catchy or memorable, but the subject matter is great. I’m surprised this is  even doing well on the charts given the fact that EDM is now a dying genre(which sucks) completely great song though and please for the love of God Hits 1 please make it smash unlike Drakes other unsuccessful songs here. Alright what do we have next? 

Uh ok, I wasn’t at all expecting this next song from Tai Verdes to debut, but uh I guess it’s here. This is called Sheluvme. I reviewed this last week and it wasn’t really sitting too well with me, but after hearing this quite a bit this week, I think I’ve slightly grown into it a bit more. This is a really joyous sounding song, and I can tell Tai had fun making it. He sounds alright here, way better than he did in 100SadSongs and LaSt DaY oN eArTh(can’t believe I even typed that out now) but not as good as he did in Let’s go to Hell and A-O-K. I really like his rap verse though in the middle of this song, and he has some great talent when it comes to rapping, his flow is insane. The production isn’t really the best, but it’s better than the other 2 songs I previously mentioned. Writing wise I’m actually kinda feelin this to, it’s fun and catchy. Overall decent song, I don’t think I’d mind this sticking around, and who knows maybe it’ll grow on me more. 

Our last debut is from none other than Charlie Puth and who is he bringing along for this next song? None other than Jung Kook of BTS(I can see some chart manipulation right here) I had very low expectations going into this considering that he worked with Jung Kook, but honestly this isn’t that bad. Charlie sounds great here, and Jung Kooks verse isn’t bad, he sounds really good, the only thing I’ll criticize for is that it’s the exact same verse just sung by a different person, so I think they could’ve expanded and written it a bit more. Other than that I really don’t care that Jung is here though. The production is quite basic, but it fits perfect with their voices and the writing, and speaking of that, it’s also pretty good. Overall not too bad. 

Best Debut-Drake-Massive 

Biggest Jump of the week: Marshmello/Khalid-Numb, The Kid Laroi-Thousand Miles & 5 Seconds of Summer-Me, Myself & I(+3)  Wow, that’s not a big jump. I’m more than happy that Numb Jumped, but it really needs to be in the top 20 by now. Thousand Miles is still a great song, although I’m starting to listen to it a lot less personally and as for Me, Myself & I, I really hope that Ashton Irwin is doing well as he had a really bad case of heat exhaustion last week, I still hate this song though and I know that they’ve produced way better. Can we get this shit outta here please. 

Biggest drop of the week: Lady Gaga-Hold My Hand(-6)  Why this has to drop I have no clue, but whatever, it is slightly losing traction elsewhere, but I don’t get why, it’s from one of the biggest movies right now. I’m not gonna question radio though, I’ll just go with the flow on this one. 

Countdown ranking 

#30 Awful-Amelia Moore-I feel everything 

#29 5 Seconds of Summer-Me, Myself & I 

Decent 

#28 The Weeknd-Out of time 

#27 Lauv-All 4 nothing(I’m so in love) 

#26 Sam Smith-Love me more 

#25 Tai Verdes-Sheluvme

#24 Harry Styles-As it was 

Good/Solid 

#23 Dove Cameron-Boyfriend 

#22 Em Beihold-Numb little bug 

#21 Ava Max-Maybe your the problem 

#20 Leah Kate-10 things I hate about you 

#19 Halsey-So Good 

Great 

#18 Megan Thee Stallion/Dua Lipa-Sweetest Pie 

#17 Alec Benjamin-Devil doesn’t bargain 

#16 Charlie Puth/Jung Kook-Left and Right 

#15 Drake-Massive 

#14 Camilla Cabello/Ed Sheeran-Bam Bam 

#13 Shawn Mendes-When Your gone 

#12 Imagine dragons-Bones 

#11 Ed Sheeran/Lil baby-2Step 

#10 Nicky Youre/Dazy-Sunroof 

#9 Harry Styles-Late night talking 

#8 Jack Harlow-First class 

#7 The Kid Laroi-Thousand Miles 

#6 Lasy Gaga-Hold my hand 

#5 Maneskin-Supermodel 

#4 Lizzo-About Damn Time 

#3 Calvin Harris/Dua Lipa/Young Thug-Potion 

#2 Post Malone/Doja Cat-I like you(A happier song) 

Best song on the countdown 

#1 Marshmello/Khalid-Numb 

5 oldest songs 

5. Ed Sheeran/Lil baby-2Step & The Weeknd-Out of time(14 weeks) 

4. Megan Thee Stallion/Dua Lipa-Sweetest Pie(16 weeks) 

3. Camilla Cabello/Ed Sheeran-Bam Bam(17 weeks) 

2. Dove Cameron-Boyfriend(18 weeks) 

1. Em Beihold-Numb little bug(20 weeks)

Countdown extra: aespa-Life’s too short  

Last years #1 song: Olivia Rodrigo-Good 4 U(5/9 weeks at #1) 

My favorite song from last year: Regard/Troye Sivan/Tate McRae-You 

My least favorite song from last year: Kali Uchis-Telepatia 

Hitbound 

Black Eyed Peas/Shakira/David Guetta-Don’t you worry 

Avril Lavigne/Machine Gun Kelly-Bois Lie(Debut) 

Dixie-A letter to me 

Amelia Moore-I feel everything 

Conan Gray-Disaster 

aespa-Life’s too short 

Ashe-Angry Woman 

Tai Verdes-Sheluvme 

Charlotte Sands-Dress 

Charlie Puth/Jung Kook-Left and Right 

Leah Kate-Twinkle Twinkle little bitch 

Joji-Glimpse of us 

Dove Cameron-Breakfast 

Nessa Barrett-Die first 

Muni Long/Saweetie-Baby boo 

Morgan Wallen-Wasted on you(Debut) 

Debuts 

Really Hits 1, we’re just gonna ignore the fact that other major artists with actual new SINGLES(doesn’t really matter if their unreleased) dropped some really great new songs the other day, alright, but just know y’all aren’t making smart decisions in my book. 

Kicking off with a song that shouldn’t be here cuz it’s months old now, we have Avril Lavigne and Machine Gun Kelly with an album track off Lavignes recent album Love Sux called Bois Lie. This is a solid song, I remember I considered putting it on my chart, but it just wasn’t good enough to make the cut. Avril sounds mostly good here, but her voice does get slightly annoying in parts because of her really high pitch. Machine Gun Kelly sounds great here though, and I really like the production and writing here. Overall not much else I’m gonna say just a really solid pop-punk song, nothing too special. 

Oh for the love of God, why must this next song, needless to say this next artist even have to be serviced to radio(yeah this shits unfortunately gonna happen) it’s Morgan Wallen with Wasted On You, off his really highly rated debut album from LAST YEAR, that’s right LAST YEAR, as in 2021. This shits a year and a half old now, radio and Hits 1 please get your sense together and don’t push songs that are more than a year old, their not current anymore, the only songs that should be pushed that are older than a year should be recurrent, so why can’t we understand that with this shitty ass song? There’s no evidence I have that makes it eligible for radio play such as TikTok, all we have is really high acclaim from people who probably have really bad taste in music, cuz this song sucks. Morgan Wallen isn’t really an artist who I particularly adore either, and I won’t get into exactly why, but most people probably know(at least if you live in the U.S) His song 7 Summers was alright at first, but has faded a lot on me since it debuted almost 2 years ago(wasn’t it another fucking one week wonder, I believe it was) as for this new, or as I will call it not-so new song, it sucks. The production here is straight up trap, and it doesn’t work with Morgan’s horrible voice. He sounds horrible throughout this, and the lyrics are just weird as all fuck. Radio and Hits 1, maybe next time make an effort to pick up a major new release instead of this shitty useless shit. 

We lost Carolina and Booty this week, I never cared for either of them as they both sucked, so yeah. 

Hitbound ranking(Not including Sunday Bests) 

#13 Dixie-A letter to me 

#12 Ashe-Angry Woman 

#11 Morgan Wallen-Wasted on you 

#10 Joji-Glimpse of us 

#9 Dove Cameron-Breakfast 

#8 aespa-Life’s too short 

Decent 

#7 Muni Long/Saweetie-Baby Boo 

Good/Solid 

#6 Avril Lavigne/Machine Gun Kelly-Bois Lie 

Great 

#5 Nessa Barrett-Die First 

#4 Charlotte Sands-Dress 

#3 Conan Gray-Disaster 

#2 Leah Kate-Twinkle Twinkle little bitch 

Best song on Hitbound 

#1 Black eyed Peas/Shakira-David Guetta-Don’t you worry 

The abyss 

JVKE-This is what falling in love feels like 

Harry Styles-Music for a sushi Restaurant 

Doja Cat-Get into it(Yuh) 

Lauren Spencer-Smith-Flowers 

Kate Bush-Running up that hill 

OneRepublic-I ain’t worried  

BEYONCE-Break my soul 

Stephen Sanchez-Until I found you 

Maggie Rogers-Want Want 

Harry Styles-Daylight 

Blurbs 

Wow this countdown was not that memorable. 

Why must I be reminded that I feel everything is still the 1 to watch, my ears bleed anytime I hear this fucking song. 

So Good has become slightly boring to listen to and remember. 

Why is I Like you taking a super slow time to move up the countdown? Come on I am really enjoying this song, let’s not make it flop please. 

Love me more has become a complete snoozefest in my opinion. 

Numb little bug is still here and it jumped this week, that’s very surprising considering it’s the oldest song here, and it got the biggest drop twice in a row. This should be gone next week. 

Speaking of old songs that are still here, I think I’m starting to question why Sweetest Pie is still here also. 

Bam Bam is starting to fall now, and out of all the old songs here, this one is defiantly the most tolerable. 

Why can’t Ava Max get into the top 10 but Lauv can? Come on seriously. 

Well at least Late night talking isn’t the laughing stock of the countdown now since it actually went up in AirPlay this week. Yay. 

Speaking of Mr Styles, is Ass it was ever gonna leave this #1 spot because now it’s starting to kinda piss me off like Shivers did. I didn’t mind Good 4 U getting 9 weeks at #1, but this I would, just drop it already. I guess the good thing though is that it dropped in AirPlay this week, so it should be out of that #1 spot next week let’s hope. 

And now ladies and gentlemen here’s the moment I’ve been waiting for, today’s exits will be presented in 3 separate paragraphs, 2 of which will be really big rants and one of which I will rejoice in. Let’s start with that one shall we. 

Viva Las Vengeance is finally outta here. Goodbye really shitty song. I never liked this and I never will understand the appeal to it, so long Panic, maybe y’all can learn to make a less angry sounding song next time you come around. I can finally rejoice, nor because of these other 2 exits though. 

AhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS GOING ON WITH THIS COUNTDOWN? No I mean really what the literal fuck? Next we say goodbye to Jiggle Jiggle by Duke & Jones and Louis Theroux, really, here’s why I’m so pissed, this song left right as I warmed up to it, in fact it’s now one of my top 5 songs on my chart debuting there this week. I get how some people probably don’t like this or understand it, but really? I mean this is a huge song on TikTok. I think TikTok is completely dumb don’t get me wrong, but really. This is a song I think that a lot of people would argue they see on TikTok, and they think it’s funny, and it is, I’ve had a fun time this week working out to this. I just don’t get why we have to drop this after only a really shitty 3 week run here. Well then Hits 1 if you wanna just throw out a good song then fine go ahead, If y’all wanna see this have success on my actual chart though please tell me and I’ll link my chart down in the comments so that everyone can see it. Now how could countdown get any worse? 

OH MY GOD ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? I LOVE U IS GONE TO, YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME HITS 1. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Hits 1 I simply don’t understand your bullshit nowadays with The Chainsmokers, it’s almost as if they use all their fucking songs for chart filler instead of making them hits unlike Who do you love, something just like this, don’t let me down. I can name a treasure trove of more songs, but I won’t. I just simply do not understand this shit. These guys obviously have a lot of #1s in weekend countdown history, along with of course my other favorite guy Shawn Mendes, so how the fuck Hits 1 thinks they can just fuck over all their new songs they get, just doesn’t sit well with me, and I’m sure this one in particular probably won’t sit well with other people in the community either. Yeah it was just an album track, but like I’ve said a million times before Hits 1 y’all can push whatever shit you guys want to, It doesn’t have to be a radio single, I’ve learned about this shit before, do I need to fly my ass to New York and march right into the PDs office and show him the god damn textbook I read for my Imtro to broadcasting class, cuz it clearly states that satellite radio isn’t limited to their playlists, which pretty much means they can pick up whatever the fuck they want, so do it, do it Hits 1, and make these guys maybe have another hit for Christ sake they had 2 of the biggest songs in North America 6 years ago, and they had your #1 song of 2019, even though it didn’t break a record of longest running #1 like Sucker did at the time, and even though it was #1 well after it fell off the hot 100. Holy shit Hits 1 do you guys not understand that they took a big fat fucking 2 year hiatus for a reason, and that it was to make this immaculate album that they now, have y’all even heard some of the cuts off this album Hits 1 it’s amazing? I don’t think you truly have because If y’all can’t make not 1 but now 2 of those songs have at least more than 1 week on the countdown, then yall suck ass. Holy crap, do I need to sign up for a TikTok account and create a dance for this? Tell me if I do cuz I will totally do it to make this fucking song mean something to the pop world including Hits 1. For god sake do  better next time and start taking into account my taste in music maybe because y’all never seem to even though I vote on this shit each and every week. Holy shit, I think I’ve ranted enough today. Goodbye great song, you will most certainly not be forgotten, and hey Hits 1 one more thing you may have just fucked over my #1 song of the year, I’m quite lucky that it doesn’t have enough points yet on my Crownnote for that though as of yet. 

Recommendations for Hits 1: pretty much anything that’s not old, nor by Ashe or any other really new and annoying TikTok artist, here’s some creative ones that I think would fit well within their rotation. 

The Chainsmokers/Bob Moses-Why Can’t you wait 

Kx5/Kaskade/Deadmau5/Hayla-Escape 

Sigala/Talia Mar-Stay the night 

Lost Frequencies/James Arthur-Questions 

Tiesto/Charli XCX-Hot in it 

Kygo/Dean Lewis-Never really loved me 

Lil Nas X/Youngboy never broke again-Late to Da party 

I could go on and on, but I’ll stop there, as y’all can probably tell all but one of these are house/EDM, so you probably get what I’m saying. 

Thank y’all so much for reading and I’ll see y’all in the next one.