A very sudden hiatus: Why haven’t I been posting for a month?

 

Hello everyone, what’s up? Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, so this is very awkward to say the least. I haven’t been reviewing the countdown for the past month, and many people here are asking why. I never planned on taking another hiatus, but this was kinda sudden and unexpected, but there have been a combination of many things that have been holding me back from posting the last 6 countdowns(wow, I just realized that’s the same amount Waffle missed back in 2019). Anyways the reasons for me going on hiatus kinda suck, so I’m gonna try and not go into too much detail on all of them, but I’ll explain a bit. Let’s get into the madness of the life of Trey the past 6 weeks. 

So on January 14th I got up(like I normally do every week) and listened to the countdown and started my post, that day I knew was gonna be pretty big for me and I knew I wouldn’t be able to get the post out because I had missed Hitbound the night before and needed to listen to some of the songs, but I couldn’t focus on blogging because I had plans to go watch my team play their wildcard game that night with my family and some friends, so I told myself since I’d have off that Monday for MLK day I’ll just get get it done then, In short my team(The Jags) won a really big game that night, they were down 27-6 at halftime to the LA Chargers and came back to beat them 31-30 in the second half of that game. Big win for us and the city of Jacksonville. We went out to celebrate that day. 

And then here’s where the darkness begins. 

I slept in on the 16th because I knew I didn’t have to go to school, but I still planned on getting ahead on schoolwork before finishing my countdown review for that weekend, so I woke up and my day was going pretty normal until. 

My mom gets a call from a friend of ours on the west coast saying that my grandmother had to be brought to the ER, because she wasn’t feeling well, the doctors talked her and in short it wasn’t great, she died in the ER within an hour a half of getting there, so that sudden event just put all emotions at an all time low for me and my family, and I couldn’t focus on schoolwork or anything. 

Now If there’s something else to add onto that. 

The day after that happened I was really depressed not only because my grandmother had died, but also because my schoolwork had a big increase in the amount of work I had to get done, so I didn’t feel confident in myself and I didn’t feel smart or that I wasn’t made to do what I am going to collage for(which is to become a history teacher), but I messaged a really good friend of mine and I told her how I’d felt and she was so sweet to me that it lifted up my spirits. By the way this friend is the girl that I was(and have been) having a crush on ever since I heard a few songs in which I reviewed in my last few posts that are now Hitbound dropouts(pointless and Paralyzed). We were actually supposed to hangout that week, until my grandmother died and I had to cancel on her(which sucks). Anyways she boosted my confidence up so much that the next day(so we’re now on January 18th folks). I told her how I felt about her and I was very honest, and she actually understand me, even though I didn’t think she would. Why did I think she wouldn’t? Cuz I’m a nerd. No really I am a big nerd in real life, and so I thought this sweet girl wouldn’t like me cuz I’m a nerd, even though I’ve known her now for like 2 years. Anyways so that happened and then I thought oh life will just go back to normal, well not even close ladies and gentlemen. 

More darkness followed. 

Less than.a week after that moment and 8 days after my grandmother died(the 24th of January now). My mom had to unfortunately put one of our family cats to sleep. We used to have 3 cats and now we have 2. It was really stressful for me because it hadn’t clicked with me yet that grandma was dead, so I was still grieving over that and then all of a sudden my cat who I’ve had for 16 years(would’ve been 17 in March). I find out has to be put to sleep because she was really old and pretty much starving herself to death. That really made me mentally fucked up and emotional, and then let me also get to the fact that when I started having feelings for the girl I just mentioned above, it started after I responded to a post of hers on social media about her missing her cat, who had died maybe 2 weeks before I started crushing out on her, so all in all it took a big fat shit on my mind mentally, and I couldn’t focus on anything, even the charts because I missed my dead grandmother, my dead cat(who was like a best friend to me). And now I missed(and still miss a lot). This person. 

So all in all folks, the last month has been pretty fucked up for me mentally, but the good news is that we had my grandmothers funeral back out west about a week and a half ago and now I’m gaining more confidence to actually ask this girl out. I actually tried writing a song about my emotions towards her, and well it turned out a bit basic, but I wrote a song for her, although I have no production or a voice to go with it. 

Also though all of this stuff has really made me stressed and paired with the excessive workload from school I didn’t really have time to blog at all, it sucks when you have a passion to blog but are pressured to get as much work done ASAP because you have to go out to California for a funeral, The hard workload continues every week, but I’m getting through it, although I am seriously afraid I’m going to fail my classes in Economics and The Vietnam Wars since they’re hard subjects to understand and since the professors aren’t really the best. 

So that’s all that happened, now how am I going to be moving forward? 

Well I’ve missed a lot of shit on this countdown(and in particular a lot of good shit to), but I’m going to continue to do this, but I won’t be back until March 3rd/4th because I have a lot of plans this weekend and I’m busy with exams and stuff. I’m going to a comedy show on Wednesday night, and I have an exam for my Medieval European History class Thursday(which also sucks), and this Friday my uncle is coming to town and we’re doing something Saturday before going to see Journey and Toto in concert Sunday night(I’m so excited for this) After that though I will be free of all weirdness or plans for right now and I plan and hope to continue the countdown reviews in March, although I can’t always promise they’ll be on time, at least until the end of the spring term in May. 

So that’s it, that’s what I’ve been through and why I haven’t been blogging. I want to thank you guys so much for understanding and I just hope at this point that I can get back into my normal blogging routine. My next post will probably review all the songs I haven’t gotten to yet, and try to catch y’all up on my opinions. Anyways until then folks, stay kind, stay happy, stay healthy and most importantly stay confident, and by for now, and thanks for reading.